When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. That is my religion. (Abraham Lincoln)


If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question? (Lily Tomlin)


Be a lamp, or a lifeboat, or a ladder. (Rumi)

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me. (Punography)

It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: “And this, too, shall pass away.” How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction! (Abraham Lincoln)


I’ll live in the moment later.


Con tu luz, si se puede. With your light, it can be done. (Carlos Santana)


I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that! (Tom Lehrer)


Before God we are all equally wise and equally foolish. (Albert Einstein)


I am amazed at the strength my little finger can muster when my hands are full. (Aaron Karo-Ruminations.com) 


Enthusiasm-from the Greek-meaning “filled with God.”


In the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you. (Leo Tolstoy)


Spring is nature’s way of saying, “Let’s party.” (Robin Williams)


I like trees because they seem more resigned to the way they have to live than other things do. (Willa Cather)


Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want. (Dan Stanford)


The smaller the mind the greater the conceit. (Aesop)


My religion is very simple…my religion is kindness. (Dalai Lama)


Music is my religion. (Jimi Hendrix)


Watching television is like taking black spray paint to your third eye. (Bill Hicks)


You can safely assume that you’ve created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do. (Anne Lamott)


Let a bird sing without deciphering the song. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)


You can’t pray a lie. (Mark Twain)


Nonviolence means avoiding not only external physical violence but also internal violence of spirit. You not only refuse to shoot a man, but you refuse to hate him. (Martin Luther King Jr.)


Laughter is an instant vacation. (Milton Berle)


We know God easily, if we do not constrain ourselves to define him. (Joseph Joubert)


Man is the only animal that has the true religion…several of them. (Mark Twain)


What do church mice believe in?...Cheeses.


I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed. (George Carlin)


We say that if a temple, or a symbol, or an image helps you to realize the divine within, you are welcome to it. Have two hundred images if you like. If certain forms and formulas help you to realize the divine…have, by all means, whatever forms, temples, whatever ceremonies you want to bring you nearer to God. But do not quarrel about them: the moment you quarrel, you are not going Godward; you are going backward toward the brutes. (Swami Vivekananda)


Man was made at the end of the week’s work when God was tired. (Mark Twain)


How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn’t make it a leg. (Abraham Lincoln)


I believe in God only I spell it Nature. (Frank Lloyd Wright)


The cure for anything is salt water; sweat, tears, or the sea. (Isak Dinesen)


Generosity is giving more than you can. (Kahil Gibran)


He who would travel happily must travel light. (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)


The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. (Eleanor Roosevelt)

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it. (Punography)

The universal brotherhood of man is our most precious possession, what there is of it. (Mark Twain)


Speak your mind even if your voice shakes. (Maggie Kuhn)


The best mind-altering drug is truth. (Lily Tomlin)


If the stars appeared only one night every thousand years, how we would marvel and appreciate them. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)


A patient complaining of melancholy consulted Dr. John Abernathy. After an examination the doctor pronounced, “You need amusement. Go and hear the comedian Grimaldi; he will make you laugh, and that will be better for you than any drugs.” Said the patient, “I am Grimaldi.” (Bartlett’s Book of Anecdotes)


Live to the point of tears. (Albert Camus)


I thought I could change the world. It took me a hundred years to figure out I can’t change the world. I can only change Bessie. And, honey, that ain’t easy either. (Annie Elizabeth “Bessie” Delany, at 104)


Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans. (John Lennon)


Truth, like gold, is to be obtained not by its growth, but by washing away from it all that is not gold. (Leo Tolstoy)


All men speak in bitter disapproval of the Devil, but they do it reverently, not flippantly. (Mark Twain)


Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP.  (Joe Namath)


Maybe this world is another planet’s hell. (Aldous Huxley)


Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better. (Albert Einstein)


The trouble with trouble is, it starts out as fun. (Naomi Judd)


Our lives teach us who we are. (Salman Rushdie)


Love thy neighbor, even when he plays the trombone. (Jewish proverb)


Don’t let other people tell you what you want. (Pat Riley)


A closed mind is a dying mind. (Edna Ferber)


I have an existential map. It has ‘You Are Here’ written all over it. (Steven Wright)


Love until it hurts. (Mother Theresa)


I always saw better when my eyes were closed. (Tom Waits)


I’m not afraid of storms, for I’m learning how to sail my ship. (Louisa May Alcott)


If I only had a little humility, I’d be perfect. (Ted Turner) 


The search for truth is but the honest searching out of everything that interferes with truth. Truth is. It can neither be lost nor sought nor found. It is there, wherever you are, being within you. Yet it can be recognized or unrecognized. (A Course in Miracles)


The winds of grace are blowing all the time. You have only to raise your sail. (Ramakrishna)


We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another. (Jonathan Swift)


The way is not in the sky. The way is in the heart. (Dhammapada)


I’m a secretary. On a good day I type ninety-five words per minute; on a bad day I show up drunk in my pajamas. (Mary Beth Cowan)


Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go. (Oscar Wilde)


The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat. (Lily Tomlin)


Life is a rock. And a hard place. (Juli Duncan)


The unhappy derive comfort from the misfortune of others. (Aesop)


Anna was saying to herself: why do I always have this awful need to make other people see things as I do? It’s childish, why should they? What it amounts to is that I’m scared of being alone in what I feel. (Doris Lessing-The Golden Notebook)


No snowflake ever falls in the wrong place. (Zen saying)


Conscious faith is freedom. Emotional faith is slavery. Mechanical faith is foolishness. (G.I. Gurdjieff)

At Duke University, there were four sophomores taking chemistry and all of them had an "A" so far. These four friends were so confident that the weekend before finals they decided to visit some friends and have a big party. They had a great time, but after all the hearty partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Duke until late Monday morning.
      Rather than taking the final then, they decided that after the final they would explain to their professor why they missed it. They said that they visited friends but on the way back they had a flat tire. As a result, they missed the final.
      The professor agreed they could make up the final the next day.
The guys were relieved. They studied that night for the exam. The professor placed them in separate rooms and gave them a test booklet. They quickly answered the first problem worth 5 points. Cool!!....they thought!
Each one in a separate room, thinking this was going to be easy....then they turned the page.
On the second page was written...
For  95  points: Which tire?


O my soul, do not aspire to immortal life, but exhaust the limits of the possible. (Pinder)


What humbugs we are, who pretend to live for Beauty, and never see the dawn! (Logan Pearsall Smith)

Prayer is not the moment when God and humans are in relationship, for that is always. Prayer is taking initiative to intentionally respond to God’s presence. (L. Robert Keck)

Not all those who wander are lost. (J.R.R. Tolkien)

It is a great obstacle to happiness to expect too much. (Bernard de Fontenelle)

(To an audience) “All you who believe in telekinesis…please raise my hand.” (Kurt Vonnegut)

The summation of all things is not God; it is man’s limited perception of God. (Ron Anjard)

The moment one gives close attention to anything, even a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself. (Henry Miller)

Truth is completely spontaneous. Lies have to be taught. (R. Buckminster Fuller)

Gentle and giving…all the rest is treason. (Kenneth Patchen)

Some things have to be believed to be seen. (Ralph Hodgson)

All paths are the same: they lead nowhere…They are paths going through the bush, or into the bush. In my own life I could say I have traversed long, long paths but I am not anywhere. My benefactor’s question has meaning now. Does this path have a heart? If it does, the path is good; if it doesn’t, it is of no use. Both paths lead nowhere; but one has heart, the other doesn’t. One makes for a joyful journey; as long as you follow it, you are one with it. The other will make you curse your life. One makes you strong; the other weakens you. (Carlos Castaneda)

A dishonest man never trusts anyone. (T. Jefferson Parker)

Wherever you go, the sky is the same color. (Persian Saying)

You don’t see things as they are. You see things as you are. (Talmud)

Say not, “I have found the truth,” rather, “I have found a truth.” (Kahlil Gibran)


The richest man in the world cannot buy a minute.


Never forget that you are unique, like everybody else.

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, “Where have I gone wrong?” Then a voice says to me, “This is going to take more than one night.” (Charlie Brown in Charles Schulz’s “Peanuts”)

Today I bent the truth to be kind, and I have no regret, for I am far surer of what is kind than I am of what is true. (Robert Brault)

If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it. (Bill Cosby)

Once upon a time a man whose ax was missing suspected his neighbor’s son. The boy walked like a thief, looked like a thief, and spoke like a thief.                But the man found his ax while digging in the valley, and the next time he saw his neighbor’s son, the boy walked, looked, and spoke like any other child. (Lao-tzu)

He who likes cherries soon learns to climb. (German proverb)

It takes a long time to become young. (Pablo Picasso)

If you can’t say something nice; don’t say nothin’ at all. (Thumper’s mom in “Bambi”)

Be humble for you are made of earth. Be noble for you are made of stars. (Serbian Proverb)

Instant gratification takes too long. (Carrie Fisher)

If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way and not starting. (Buddha)

Maybe the saddest thing in life is what you never get to say. Or maybe it’s that you don’t know how to say it. (Al Green)

It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it. (Sam Levenson)

Map out your future, but do it in pencil. (Jon Bon Jovi)

Bidden or not bidden, God is present. (Carl Jung)

The traveler sees what he sees. The tourist sees what he has come to see.

I cannot believe in a God who wants to be praised all the time. (Friedrich Nietzsche)

Why is it when we talk to God, we’re said to be praying…but when God talks to us, we’re schizophrenic? (Lily Tomlin)

He who builds to every man’s advice will have a crooked house. (Danish proverb)

To know when you have enough is to be rich. (Lao-Tzu)

The Creator is a comedian whose audience is afraid to laugh. (H.L. Mencken)


Life is a long lesson in humility. (James M. Barrie)

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re okay, then it’s you. (Rita Mae Brown)

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible. (George Burns)


A Cherokee elder was teaching his grandchildren about life. He said to them, “A fight is going on inside me…it is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

One wolf represents fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego.

The other stands for joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.

This same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too.”

The children thought about it for a minute, and then one asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”

The old Cherokee replied…”The one you feed.”


In the Baemba tribe of South Africa, when a person acts irresponsibly or unjustly, he is placed in the center of the village, alone and unfettered. All work ceases, and every man, woman, and child in the village gathers in a large circle around the accused individual. Then each person in the tribe speaks to the accused, one at a time, about all the good things the person has done in his lifetime. All his positive attributes, good deeds, strengths, and kindnesses are recited carefully and at length. The tribal ceremony often lasts several days. At the end, the tribal circle is broken, a joyous celebration takes place, and the person is symbolically and literally welcomed back into the tribe. (Alice Walker)


I hear reincarnation is making a comeback.


A wise man once said nothing.


If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything. (Mark Twain)


Of course there is no formula for success except, perhaps, an unconditional acceptance of life and what it brings. (Arthur Rubinstein)