SPORTS

 

The game isn’t over ‘til it’s over. (Yogi Berra)

 

Being number two sucks. (Andre Agassi) 

 

I have a black eye in karate.

 

Every Olympic event should include one average person competing, for reference.

 

Football is not a contact sport, it is a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. (Duffy Daugherty/Michigan State)

 

When you win, say nothing. When you lose, say less. (Paul Brown)

 

Swing hard, in case they throw the ball where you’re swinging. (Duke Snider)

 

HOW I WON THE MARATHON by Randy Holeway

 

Talk is cheap. Let’s go play. (Johnny Unitas-Hall of Fame Quarterback)

 

I was watching the Super Bowl with my ninety-two-year-old grandfather. The team scored a touchdown. They showed the instant replay. He thought they scored another one. I was gonna tell him, but figured the game he was watching was better. (Steven Wright)

 

Failure to prepare is preparing to fail. (John Wooden)

 

I make my practices real hard…because if a player is a quitter…I want him to quit in practice, not in a game. (Bear Bryant/Alabama)

 

Do you know what I love most about baseball? The pine tar, the resin, the grass, the dirt. And that’s just in the hot dogs. (David Letterman)

 

The pitcher has to find out if the hitter is timid. And if the hitter is timid, he has to remind the hitter he’s timid. (Don Drysdale)

 

The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided. (Casey Stengel)

 
You can always begin again. You throw a touchdown, well, now we begin. You throw an interception, you can begin again. It’s living your faith. (Phillip Rivers, Quarterback, San Diego Chargers)

 

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it. (Joan Rivers)

 

I’m pushing 60. That’s enough exercise for me. (Mark Twain)

 

There’s more to boxing than hitting. There’s not getting hit, for instance. (George Foreman)

 

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me! (Punography)

 

It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. (Hank Aaron)

 

I asked my good friend, Arnold Palmer, how I could improve me golf game. He advised me to cheat. (Bob Hope)

 

Why did the football coach go to the bank?...to get his quarterback.

 

To make a sharp turn in a car, “Slow in, Fast out.”

 

Rage against fear and make it disappear. (Carlos Santana)

 

Golf is a good walk spoiled. (Mark Twain)

 

My husband is from England and had never seen a football game. So I could tell him anything I wanted. I told him it was over at half-time. (Rita Rudner)

 

Swimming is good for you. Especially if you’re drowning.